Seven Tips to Find a Mentor

A friend recently asked how to find a writing mentor.

Yeah, I’d like one, too!

One of my graduate classes was on mentoring, albeit focused on Millennials and spirituality. The principles I learned, however, apply to any type of mentoring, for most any age.

The reality is that good mentors are hard to find. The best-qualified ones don’t usually have time to mentor, whereas the people with time often have less to offer. Expertise and availability usually exist in inverse proportion.

Instead of just waiting for someone to offer to mentor you, here are seven ideas:

  1. Look at Existing Relationships: If you have a connection with an author you respect, ask if he or she is willing to consider being your mentor. But don’t make this person feel obligated; provide the space for him or her to say “no.”
  2. Form New Relationships: Network with other writers and see what develops. However, don’t approach this with an agenda; if you do, you will fail. Instead, seek to help others, give to others, encourage others, and support others. You may catch the attention of a potential mentor who will approach you. And even if that doesn’t happen you will learn, grow, and feel good about yourself in the process.
  3. Be Patient and Pray: Yes, I said to pray that someone will offer to mentor you. I could have said “wait and hope,” but prayer is so much more effective and may be your best option.
  4. Consider Peer Mentoring: You can seek a peer mentoring relationship, where two writers help each other. There is strength in traveling the writing path with a friend. If one of you falls down, the other can pick you up.
  5. Offer to be a Mentor: Often when we give to others, what we receive back is more valuable.
  6. Use Books: Books allow mentoring at a distance, be it over space or time. Of course, the information is one-way and more general, but this may be the only way to receive guidance from a famous author.
  7. Respect the Process: If you find a mentor, honor his or her commitment to you: prepare for each meeting, take diligent notes, follow through on every suggestion, be easy to work with, and seek tangible ways to give back. Also, always arrive early and never cancel.

If you have a mentor, how did it happen? If you don’t have a mentor, what are your thoughts on finding one?

2 thoughts on “Seven Tips to Find a Mentor

  1. Great post Peter. I wish I knew you two years back. 🙂
    Sorry for not staying in touch. Too much on my plate lately! Did I wish you Happy New Year? Blessings and Light, always!

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